Leaves change to brilliant shades of crimson, scarlet, canary, and tangerine before they fall from branches bearing buds which hibernate until the following renewal of spring.

This month also elicits bittersweet emotions for me personally.

As I am in the autumn of my life, and literally born under the sign of Libra, I am conscious of how quickly time can slip away.

I have experienced sudden losses of life throughout my own, which raises my awareness of the precious gift each day with loved ones brings.

My journey has had numerous twists and turns, a wide variety of adventures; some of the most significant being inward.

Introspection is a blessing and a curse.

Living in the present moment is most fulfilling for me as a conscious choice, being aware of consequential actions.

I remind myself to ‘be still and smile’, as the mystery of my future unfolds before me while my past falls away . .  .

Three years ago another baby was born on a date with numbers that when interchanged signify the meaningful passing of a soul close to him.

All of these individuals are genetically related to one another and three of them to me.

On the day of the earlier of these births, as I stood on a dock overlooking a glistening lake, the most glorious double rainbow appeared before me which encircled the heavens overhead and the lake beneath me, forming a perfectly magnificent double circle of colour.

Birth and death of course are parts of the same cycle of life.

What happens before and after each of these events is a mystery revealed only to the participant, the traveller.

However, as one who is open to receiving signs of life from the universe, particularly those in nature, I truly embrace whatever is presented.

My life experience dictates that the most colorful rainbows follow heavy downpours from cloudy skies.

This honour has been reserved for few dignitaries in Canada.

Jack Layton is one of those.

His accomplishments as the first NDP federal leader to surpass the other opposition parties in his run to rival the race to lead the country is an astounding feat.

He defeated the Bloc in Quebec and parliament, as well as the Liberal party.

His sheer tenacity and optimism served him well in his fight to bring social injustice to light.

He kept the other party leaders accountable.

Prior to entering the federal arena, he had a long history in Toronto fighting at City Hall for his beliefs.

It has been noted that whether one agreed with him or not, Jack had an engaging quality to communicate with all.

Obviously, people listened even when other politicians chose not to do so, specifically in Quebec.

His sense of humour, smiling eyes, and especially his down to earth style with everyone, particularly those experiencing the battle with cancer that Jack Layton bravely faced and unfortunately lost, will be sorely missed.

Gone too soon . . . .

In recent years their numbers grow daily.

When tragedy strikes and civilians lose their lives in any circumstance, it seems appropriate to remember them on this day as well.

Honoring the memory of  each individual means living the most honorable, love-filled life one possibly can, expressing gratitude for each day as it unfolds . . . .

One year ago today I was hiking the Seven Sisters in England and wrote about this experience on my return; however, I was unable to post in my blog on the ten month anniversary of her death.

This had been the first time I did not write here on the fifteenth of the month.

Each of those first twelve months it was important for me to do so, as that gesture enabled healing to occur.

In spite of moments of sadness, I now feel at peace. 

In fact, I have a new mantra that assists my inner journey to that place where I am most comfortable . . .    Peace,  love,  joy . . .  the sea is calm.

For men, there is also Father’s Day in June to return the favour!

There are probably as many different types of mothers as there are women on this planet. 

Unfortunately, not all are the nurturers one hopes would conjure warm and fuzzy feelings at the mere thought of them.

All are human to be sure, with the frailties that state of being brings.

Some women have been fortunate to have had an excellent role model in their own childhood, and they become ‘naturals’ it seems in the realm of motherhood.

Others become parents accidentally and are ill-prepared for the lifelong task.

Most fall somewhere between the two extremes. 

Those who embrace the role passionately usually thirst for knowledge, and spend countless hours learning all they can with respect to raising children.

When there are past unresolved childhood issues, these can surface, most at a subconscious level, as mothers guide or merely observe their boys and girls as they enter each stage of development.

Opportunities for personal growth are afforded when this happens, or conversely unconscious inner turmoil can create trauma influencing parenting decisions affecting their children.

Now that I am a mature woman with adult children of my own, I recognize that my mother was an individual who did her best with what she knew while raising me and my siblings.

In her elder years before her death, my mother’s youthful personality came to light after years of being submerged while caring for others.

She was of a generation of women who believed caregiver was mostly synonymous with martyr.

Fortunately I learned the fallacy of this belief, although not before experiencing some of its negative consequences.

Self-caring is what enables one to be a healthy caregiver.

Whatever type of mother one has/had, the most important reason to acknowledge Mother’s Day is to express gratitude for the woman who brought a life into this world &/or the woman who parented that individual, you!

My heart goes out to you.  My prayers are with all of you.

Many tragedies are occurring worldwide.  All are important and deserve our reflection and assistance in whatever way we are able to do that.

Balancing all of this devastation is the excitement and happiness of The Royal Wedding about to take place Friday in London, England.

The global community needs to balance tears with laughter, just as each of us benefit from doing this individually.

When directly in the midst of horror it is impossible to find this balance ourselves, and it is the responsibility of each one of us to provide comfort and support to others even if  only in the gesture of sending positive, healing thoughts . . . .

Of course, that is nothing compared to the devastating losses incurred from a bombardment of tornadoes in North Carolina and across several states recently.

Everything in this life is relative and fleeting. 

Unpredictable to say the least!

In this part of the world, the rhyme ‘April showers bring May flowers’ is replaced with ‘April snow showers bring . . . . ‘

Uncertainty or at least delayed growth.

Embracing each moment while treasuring one another seems the most uplifting course to take as Easter approaches.

The anticipation of resurrected life that this time of year signifies, be it through our Lord as a Christian or spring renewal as a naturalist, brings a hopeful attitude to all, which creates a certainty that life will unfold as it is intended and the cycle will continue . . . .

Not long from now, the air, as it warms, will carry all of the sweet scents of this season.

Unlike yesterday, when my mud hike through the Rouge Valley, although sunny, was accompanied by a very cold wind chill.

My group encountered ice-covered trails mixed with mud-covered ice boulders, and bogs of thick muddy clay forests to negotiate.

As I navigated an outdoor obstacle course, our allied forces with UN sanction were conducting air strikes to implement a no-fly zone over Libya.

More lives will be lost in the quest to ultimately stop the genocide the Libyan dictator is perpetrating on his own people.

Quite the opposite from the peaceful revolution scenario that unfolded not too long ago in Egypt.

And then of course, there is the grave situation in Japan.

When I absorb the grief in this world, I become like a sponge, and I can no longer function normally.  The heaviness of it all weighs me down. 

Laughter does not come easily, nor does sleep.

My body, mind and emotions are exhausted.  Restlessness stirs me to find healing.

It is time to seek the sea, sand and sun which will enable me to transition from winter to spring.

As smooth grains of sand caress my feet while soothing waves serenade my soul and warm sunlight bathes my being, I will listen to the inner voice that can only be heard in the stillness.