Judy Price is Writing

Love, passion, sex, lust, none of these, some of these, or all of these?

Whatever your perspective, beliefs, values, desires, mores, needs will most likely dictate the semantics used when getting what you want sexually from the partner of choice, or whether you decide to get nothing at all.

The terminology most often used by men, whether in a relationship or not, is ‘to make love’.

How many times have women heard the phrase, “I want to make love to you” by someone they only met once.

In reality, one can only ‘make love’ to someone who is ‘loved’.

Otherwise, the correct word usage would be ‘to have sex’ with someone who is not yet ‘loved’ or perhaps not even ‘liked’ or ‘known’ but definitely ‘wanted’, at least for the moment.

To clarify, it is the body that is wanted, not necessarily any other part of the person that makes up the ‘whole’.

How does one know which it is?

Unless the partner states, ‘I want to have sex with you, and maybe only this one time’, how would you know?

Length of time spent with each other might be the first clue.

How much is known about the person and in fact verified to be true, might be another indicator.

Just because the word ‘love’ is used in a phrase or sentence do not be fooled.

Unless both persons have ‘spoken aloud’ what it is each really wants from the other, make no mistake.  There is no relationship, only sex.  And maybe only one time. 

In which case, if both persons are adults, and willing participants in the ‘spoken’ arrangement, then my advice  is to ‘be safe’ and that is that.

However, sometimes women are not fully aware of the ‘hidden’ consequences of having casual sex. 

I am not referring to the medical or physical effects but rather to the ‘soul’ effects.

Women, unlike men, bond in a spiritual and emotional way every time sex occurs. 

She ‘gives’ and ‘opens’ her body and soul to him in order to ‘receive’ him.

Some women are not consciously aware that each time they ‘give’ themselves to a man, they ‘give’ away a part of their souls.

After a while, if they have given themselves to various men, women numb themselves to their own spirituality, and lose a piece of their souls, over and over again. 

The sad thing is that some women do not even realize the pain this choice can cause to themselves.  

Women need to be aware that men are biologically engineered to have multiple partners, and it is only their ‘conscious’ decision to have one mate that will dictate what they do. 

Men ‘enter’ and ‘withdraw’.  That is a fact.

A man cannot give himself completely to one woman unless he ‘decides’ to do so, and this involves a ‘commitment’.

If one listens to male experts with respect to relationships and the differences between men and women, then one knows that most men are ‘commitment phobics’.

Which brings us full circle. 

Unless a man or woman speaks ‘aloud’ the words, ‘I am committed to having a relationship with you’, and then proceeds to follow up these words with behaviours that match the words, which then engenders trust, it is just sex!

I hope that answers the question.