Judy Price is Writing

Love is what makes the ‘world go ’round’, right?

Guess that is the reason it feels like the ‘end of the world’ when love is lost or unrequited.

How does one ’heal a broken heart’?

Guess it depends on how strong the love that broke the heart.

Someone once told me that within 24 hours of his father dying, his mother followed, although she had no illness as did her spouse.

As much as it hurt her adult children and grandchildren to lose her, it would appear that she could not live on earth without the ‘love of her life’, and nothing could heal her broken heart.

“Love hurts’ as well when that love is not returned.

‘Time heals all wounds’ would hopefully apply in this case.

I believe that in spite of the pain that the search for love can cause, it is the ‘pleasure principle’ that keeps us engaged in our longing for that ‘once in a lifetime’ kind of  reciprocal, romantic, passionate love with one’s soul mate.

When these two have found each other, the poet would advise to ‘never let it go’ as ‘love conquers all’ in this life and the next . . .

Tomorrow signals the end of October. 

Halloween was always a flurry of activity in my household, first as a child myself, and then later as a mother.

Homemade costumes were the order of the day in both scenarios; I being the recipient in the former and creator in the latter. 

As a parent, I recall ’dressing up’ while dishing out goodies as the greeter of  ’trick or treaters’.

One year I might be ‘fiercely frightening’ and the next ‘creatively colourful’. 

Those were ‘fun’ and tender times. 

My inner child easily surfaced with young children of my own to show me the way.

Now it takes a little more work to engineer the journey inward to find her.

Memories conjure moments lost, while feelings of anticipation linger . . .

Lately, I have been on a personal journey to discover more about myself.

Specifically, I intend to expand my horizons by allowing feelings as opposed to thoughts guide my way.

That is a challenge for one who is an analytical thinker.

The good news is that being female, my emotions or feelings are readily available!

Today I learned that even as a pre-schooler, little more than a toddler, I questioned how my arms, hands, legs, and everything else is able to move; what makes it all work I would ponder.

There must be some magic to get it going, I thought, not knowing anything about energy or electrical synapses etc  at that age.

What I did know was that I felt free as I ran barefoot and rolled in green grass, gazing up at blue sky while seeing all manner of creatures in the clouds above me.

Most of my childhood was spent outdoors in all seasons, alone with my vivid imagination. 

However, I did not feel lonely, just peaceful and happy.

I felt that I was intrinsically part of the universe, both the visible and the unseen. 

I felt secure and respected.

I was certain that my questions would be heard and answered.

The soft breeze against my skin while blowing through my hair whispered sweetly, calling me to play. . .

At the risk of disagreeing with writers who try to teach one sex how to understand the other with the primary goal of getting what one wants from the other, I must ‘weigh in’.

Knowing that men and women generally think and process the world differently, I agree that the better we understand each other, the greater the opportunity to successfully communicate with one another in order to get our respective needs met.

However, I am not an advocate of asking one person to make the changes to ‘hopefully’  get what the individual ‘wants’ from the other.

I find it ‘arrogant’, and frankly ‘manipulative’ to assume that the onus is on one sex to behave in such a way as to accommodate the other, with the hope that the other will eventually react in a positive way and also change.

I tend to think that psychological manipulation is dishonest, and I do not believe that the ’end’ justifies the ‘means’. 

These ‘how to’ tactics probably do work in the short term with no guarantee for the long term. 

People are creatures of habit and unless ‘genuine conscious’ change occurs for both partners then it probably will not last.

In my view, trust in one another, which is developed through truth and the demonstration of ‘honest’ behaviours, bodes much better for relationship longevity.

When each of us does the ‘work’ to learn about him/her self and how to communicate with others, it will be much easier to choose a partner who is the ’right’ fit; one who also knows how to communicate effectively and honestly.

People watching is one of my favourite pastimes, especially when I travel alone.

In Alaska, while admiring the allure of this vast and challenging environment which leaves a lasting impression on the viewer, and where the wilderness of  Denali showcases the draw to this country, The Last Frontier, I noticed an uncanny comparison to its men.

I recall a past television show, ‘Men in Trees’, filmed in Alaska, which implied that there are as many men in the state as there are trees.

However, I would agree that I saw more men of all ages than I did women, but not nearly as many men as the multitude of trees in my view, during my two week stay.

I noticed that most of the men I saw congregated in groups and were really enjoying the company of other men.

They were routinely drinking, watching football, listening to live music, and socializing with one another.

Even on a Saturday night this was the norm. 

I have to believe that some of them were married or had girlfriends, yet no women were with the majority of men I saw.  

I don’t believe that all or even most of them were homosexual. 

These men just seemed to truly prefer the company of men to women.

The phrase, ‘man’s man’ comes to mind.

I would venture a guess that these  Alaskan men are as challenging for women to relate to as the rugged and dangerous landscape is for these men to negotiate

In the beginning stages of a relationship dating is the norm.

However, as time goes by ‘togetherness’ can become boring for couples who live apart or together, and especially for those who have children.

The longer the relationship, the more mundane the routine, unless each partner makes a conscious effort to ‘change things up’ in some way.

The easiest way to do this is to take turns planning a ’date’ once per week to maintain closeness and connectivity with one another.

As long as both partners are willing to experience new and old activities together, it doesn’t really matter what is planned.

It need not be extravagant, just something both can enjoy that will provide the opportunity to experience time together to rekindle the spark.

Once alone as a couple, talking and enjoying each other’s company, creating the intimate moment will be much easier to do.

It is when two people, even when living together, are distant from one another for weeks at a time without communication, that difficulties in the relationship can set in.

Just as our plants require water, nutrient-rich soil, and sunlight to grow and thrive, couples need to nurture one another and their relationship with attentive loving care through touch, talk, and time together.

It always takes ‘two’ to make it successful.

How can two people who share ‘chemistry’ lack passion together?

I used to think that the ‘spark’ which creates the fire comes from the attraction/chemistry factor.

Wrong!

In order for two people to want to explore the ’possibility of passion’ occurring between them, the attraction or chemistry they feel is one of the components that draws them to one another.

From there, it is anyone’s guess!

A ‘passionate’ as opposed to a comfortable or careful (veneer-oriented,lol) kiss ignites the flame, like a ‘lit’ match sparks the fire. 

It takes two passionate kisses simultaneously, one from each partner, to create the spark!  Otherwise, there will not be any ‘fireworks’!

I recall a line in the movie, ‘Pretty Woman’, when Julia Roberts, who plays a prostitute to Richard Gere’s character, tells him, ‘No kissing’.

Her rationale is that ‘kissing’ is more intimate than sex.

Provided the kiss is ‘passionate’, I agree.

There are lyrics from a pop song of long ago that went something like, it’s ‘in the kiss’!!!

Most likely in the ‘first’ kiss . . .

Yesterday the colonel’s trial began.

As a continuation of my February 9th article entitled, ‘Betrayal’, I will give my opinion regarding what is in the media on this subject.

http://judypriceiswriting.com/articles/betrayal/

Russell Williams, as he will be called when his military rank is stripped from him, has plead guilty to all charges.

His diabolical nature has been revealed in all of its depravity.

We are told by forensic psychiatrists that this type of behaviour is more common in our society than we think! 

Woe are we if that is a fact.

In spite of all of the theories attempting to explain these acts, I tend to think that this man must have a ‘hole’ in his soul.

A clinical psychologist once described a ‘narcissist’ in this way.

How does one fill a hole in the soul?  That begs an answer.

I would venture a theory that several types of addictions are attempts to fill this empty space within the spiritual core.

In Williams case, I believe that ‘evil’ filled the hole in his soul, which is the only explanation I have found that can account for the merciless, morally corrupt acts he perpetrated on his victims.

Just think what might have been in his future and that of the young women he destroyed, if the hole in his soul had conversely been filled with the spirit of love and light which I call ‘God’ . . .

If I were a ‘bird of prey’ or  ‘raptor’, which one would I be?

Preferably a falcon, a Peregrine falcon!

I have always wanted to fly, and as a human, would have seriously considered becoming a pilot had my aptitude test results involving inverted spatial orientation been more positive!

Dentistry was out of the question as well, yet never an interest of mine.

Speed, grace, elegance, beauty, as well as extreme visual acuity; all enter into the picture. 

These falcons are nature’s fastest fliers; Peregrines have been clocked flying, or swooping, at speeds of up to 220 miles, and recorded as endurance fliers at distances of up to 1000 miles, according to what I have read!

Enjoying speed and distance on the ‘trails’, I would definitely appreciate the flight as a Peregrine falcon   

They feed primarily on birds they take in the air: their prey includes ducks, pheasants, and pigeons.

As I enjoy the first two tasty fowl in my human state, the ‘leap’ or in this case ‘dive’, to their consumption as a falcon would be relatively easy.  Pigeons on the other hand, I cannot fathom eating!

Knowing I can dream and never realize this feathered dimension, the next best thing for me is hang-gliding.

Now, that is a journey of flight that is feasible for me to anticipate and to navigate!